Harry Potter and the King Of Darkness
by Josie Gibbons
Summary: This is my own version of what i think book 7 should be. its HG, RH and LN, with some FB thrown in in places. I'M BACK... REGULAR UPDATES NOW
1. No Longer A Child

Harry Potter and the King of Darkness

Please note that this chapter was written at about half eight in the evening of the sixteenth of July, but I didn't have Internet access so I couldn't post it. So at the time of writing this I was in a very Rowling hating mood…just so you're warned. That is also all the explanation I'm giving for the next (and very long and boring) A/N.

A/N: I'm using my normal three major ships in this story, Ginny/Harry, Ron/Hermione and Luna/Neville, though Luna and Neville are a background match. They are sweet, and so they have a part in most of my Harry Potter fics. I don't know why I like it so much, I suppose it's just that a romance like that had never even been thought about for a character like Neville before, and when she introduced Luna in OOTP it all looked like things would be more interesting. Well, they already are but you know…Neville and Luna ROCK!

Although I don't really want to I've decided to write a post Halfblood Prince fic which isn't a depressing story about Dumbledore (Rest In Peace). This is going to be my own version of the seventh book because I just can't stand waiting two years for J.K Rowling to write it. And I doubt very much that I'm the only one who is baying for her blood today (still). Dumbledore wasn't supposed to die in the sixth book…he wasn't supposed to die until the seventh. Anyway, on with the story.

DISCLAIMER: I don't own any of J.K Rowling's characters but I wouldn't complain if I did. _I _wouldn't have killed off Albus Dumbledore!

In loving and respectful memory of Albus Wolveric Brian Dumbledore, the greatest headmaster Hogwarts school has ever had.

Chapter One: No longer a Child. 

"Do I look okay? Iz my hair right? I hope very much dat zee hair is not wrong today. Today I must it look perfect."

"You look fine Fleur, don't worry about it." It was the morning of Bill and Fleurs wedding, and Ginny had been given the unfortunate job of helping her to get ready. While general relations between the Weasleys and Fleur had been on an all time high that didn't mean that anyone was exactly getting on great with her. Except maybe Molly, but that was different. Ever since 'that creature' had scavenged Bill they had been getting on incredibly well and were often to be found swapping recipes because Molly had decided that no daughter-in-law of hers was going to be a bad cook.

"You okay Gin?" Harry asked, poking his head around the door and then pulling it back quickly as he was met by a large amount of curses by Fleur for seeing her before she was ready. "Okay, okay. I'm going." He missed Ginny so much, but he didn't want to have to admit it to her face. Ron knew, and so did Hermione, but then they always seemed to know how he was feeling. Harry had been worried that he and Ginny wouldn't be able to talk to each other after he was forced to split up with her but his fear wasn't based in anything. If anything their friendship has become stronger in the past month since Dumbledore's funeral, and he loved her to bits still.

"Look, Fleur, you were really nasty to Harry then, I think you should calm down a bit." Ginny said to Fleur, and though she knew that he was listening she let the conversation continue. "He didn't do anything wrong and you jumped right down his throat."

"Yea, well. E came in when I had said not too, and anyway, you only say dat because you have feelings for im."

"Yea, I have feelings for him, I care for Harry more than anyone else in the world but what difference does that really make to anything. You were rude to him and I think you should apologise."

"You can hardly talk. I see you, you trying to hide your feelings from Harry as if he iz some strange person who cannot tell. Take a leaf out of Luna's book for once and speak the truth straight out instead of hiding it behind all your fancy words."

"I suppose I should, I'm just so worried he'll reject me." it was horrible hearing her speak like that, Harry thought. For the past two weeks he had been telling himself that she didn't have feelings for him anymore, even though Hermione had kept telling him that she did and that he should go back on his decision. If he went back with Ginny then that would just put her in danger and that was the one thing he could never do. He turned away from the heated argument now rising behind the door and walked numbly down to the kitchen, tripping over Kreature as he did so.

"What do you think you're doing?" Harry asked, but it wasn't in the cross tone he would have once used. He had become steadily softer towards Kreature in the past few weeks, and as a present for Mrs Weasley he had instructed him to help her in any way she asked. To his great surprise his instructions hadn't been met with the normal muttering, or if it was Kreature had been careful not to let himself be heard. It wasn't just Harry who had changed though; because Hermione's belief that being nice to him would eventually have made him into a nicer person seemed to have been true. Since he had come to the burrow and had proper work to do and people caring for him he had become a much more willing servant.

"Morning Harry." Molly smiled at him from the stove where she was busy cooking breakfast while the twins absentmindedly flicked crusts of bread at her from under the table.

"Will you two stop doing that?" She yelled over her shoulder. "I don't see you two trying to help. Harry dear, you don't happen to have seen Kreature do you?" her voice softened when she spoke to him.

"Yea, I just passed him on the way up the stairs, carrying loads of ironed washing up with him." He dismissed the matter idly, what a house elf did wasn't really top on his mind at the moment.

"Honestly, that house elf has changed beyond imagine. If you saw it now you wouldn't even know it was the same elf as the one which lived at Grimmauld Place. He's helped me so much Harry, I can't get over that you've made him help me."

"Yea, well I don't really think there's going to be anything else for him to do this time next year." Hermione frowned at him from where she was sitting beside Ron.

"Harry, don't talk like that. Of course there's going to be something left this time next year. Everything's going to be all right. Don't you worry about it! Dumbledore would have never let you hear the prophecy if he hadn't believed that you had a chance."

"I dunno." Harry muttered, sliding down into a chair opposite her. "Dumbledore always seemed to give me a chance to cause him damage but I would have died every time if it hadn't been for having him turn up at the right moment."

"Yea, well. I'm not saying Dumbledore was great or anything but he was one person who turned up after you'd already practically defeated him, and we're three and we're going to be with you all the time."

"Two, Hermione, There are two of you. I thought we'd gone through this before."

"Harry, Ginny loves you. She's not going to stay at home while she knows you're out their risking your life to save the Wizarding world."

"I know, but I don't want to risk her getting hurt, and if she comes then there's no guarantee that she won't die. I could never live with myself if it was my fault that she got hurt."

"She's got about as much chance of getting hurt as me and Hermione." Ron spoke up for the first time.

"Yea, and I know the way Voldemort works, and I know he'll try and get anyone who I care for. It's always the way he works, always has been and always will be. It's bad enough that you two are coming and putting yourselves in danger but I don't want him to know how much I care for Ginny so I can't let her come with us."

"Okay, I suppose." Ron replied slowly. "But think about letting her come Harry, she really cares for you and it'd nearly be an insult to her not to let her come."

"Yea, I know. I just don't want to see her get hurt."

All reviews, good or bad, are greatly appreciated.  
Love and Peace,

The One and Only,

Stargazing Maiden.


	2. Conversation

Chapter two: Conversation. 

A/N, this is the chapter that should have originally have gone in as chapter two. But it took me a long time to get it together so I'm only going to slot it in now.

Disclaimer: Have I ever said I own? No? Well then I don't, do I!

The brightly lit sky was barely visible through the gap in the curtains, but still it caught Harry's eyes and drew them to it. Almost as if it were calling out to him, telling him that he'd done something wrong, that there was something he had to do, someone he had to go and talk to. Well of course he knew he had to go to talk to someone, he'd been telling himself that he'd go and do it for three nights now. He just hadn't, that was the problem. No matter how much or how often he told himself that the only option was to go and talk to her he just couldn't pluck up the courage too. He supposed it was because he was scared of having to admit his feelings, but then he'd already done that before, and it hadn't really been that hard. But the last time had been different. They'd been surrounded by loads of other people and things just seemed to…flow. But there would be non of that now, because for some reason whenever he entered a room with her in it everyone else seemed to disappear off to do some unknown business, and he always found himself alone with her, unable to think or to speak properly. He knew deep down that they were only doing that to give him the time they felt he needed, but he would have found it easier if there had been other people. Harry looked away from the moonlit sky and gazed around the room, hoping for some sign that what he was doing was a good idea. Funnily enough there was one; because sitting on the bedside table where he'd left it not four hours before was a birthday card from Ginny. He opened it, and read the oh so familiar handwriting inside.

'Dear Harry. Happy birthday, you're of age now, but I'll always be waiting for you to realise the most major part of being an adult. Love, Ginny.'

That was all the proof he really needed that it was time he moved. Because of course he had to talk to her now. he had to tell her how he felt before it was too late, tell her that he wanted her to go with him to his parents graves, and to wherever his hunt for the Horcruxes would take him, and to be with him through it all. There wasn't really any reason not to ask her to come now, because his old excuse of her being too young and not really ready for it, and that he didn't want her to get hurt, was wasted. Hermione and Ron were refusing to stay behind and when Ginny had discovered that they were coming without Harry causing any fuss she had become very angry. To put it lightly. Harry fondly remembered her use of the bat boogie hex on Fred when he had tried to restrain her. Sighing slightly he got out of bed and, stretching, crossed the hall to her doorway. Knocking lightly he didn't speak, waiting to see if she was awake before making any more noise. He didn't want to wake her, because he had heard her complaining to Hermione recently about how hard she'd been finding it to sleep. He needn't have worried about waking her though, because second after he knocked he heard her hoarse whisper.

"Who is it?"

"It's me." he whispered back. "Can I come in?"

"I suppose." He heard her shuffling around behind the door and opened it slowly, trying not to make any sound but knowing instinctively that it would creak. Her door always did, because he'd been listening to her movements for a few weeks now, even since he'd come to the Burrow.

He looked around as he entered, realising only now that he'd never actually seen the inside of her bedroom before. He was amazed to find that it was decked from head to toe with the richest purples gold's and reds, their materials ranging from the roughest and hurriedly painted patch of wall beside the bed to the smoothest silk. Every surface had a hanging or covering of some type, and each wall was covered in shelves and chests, many filled with books and clothes, but Harry couldn't help noticing that one of them held photo's of all her family. Behind the bed in the corner was a huge Lion, which Harry realised at once represented Gryffindor House and Hogwarts. Ginny herself was sitting at the one uncovered surface, writing away at something on the desk before her.

"What you up to?" harry asked, coming behind her and slipping his arms around her neck gently, barely touching her.

"Homework." She replied stiffly, but not trying to remove his arms.

"Ginny…" Harry whispered, even though he was sure no-one would be able to hear him in here. It was just the feel the place gave him. "Ginny…" he tried again. "Look, I'm really sorry okay." He whispered desperately, moving away from her to sit on the edge of the bed.

"I didn't want to loose you, Gin. That was why I said I couldn't be with you, because I was afraid." She turned to stare at him but didn't say anything, so he continued.

"Every time I looked at you I saw a target, something that he was going to take from me. I'd just watched him take Dumbledore when he was trying to help me, and he took Sirius from me for the same reason. Even my parents died trying to protect me. I couldn't bare to see the same thing happen to you, I just couldn't. It would kill me Ginny." She seemed to melt, and then came and sat down beside him, slipping her hand into his and squeezing it gently.

"He's already used me as a target before and he realised that it didn't work. He won't try again Harry, because it didn't work last time. I might not know as much about him as you do, but I know what type of people they are, and he won't want to risk messing up again. Messing up is the greatest fear in the world for a person like him. That and becoming reliant on someone."

"It's amazing you know all these things, when I can barely understand them myself." Harry smiled at her, realising how stupid he had been to ever think that he could survive without her.

"Ginny." He whispered again.

"Yea."

"I love you. I hope you realise that."

"I love you too." she smiled, and slipped her arms around him, holding her to him as if she was never going to let him go. Then. "But I guess this means you're just going to tell me that you're going to have to leave me again."

"No." Harry smiled at her, and held her to him once more. "This time I want you to come with me, to be with me forever, because I love you Gin, and I couldn't bare to leave you."


	3. darkness meeting

Chapter Three: Darkness Meeting

Chapter Three: Darkness Meeting.

AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH. People kept telling me that chapter two was repeated but I didn't believe them, and now I'm on chapter fifteen (writing sixteen) I finally get around to checking and guess what… I was wrong. So here, finally, is the real version of chapter three, how it was supposed to look and how it was written (about two and a half years ago now I think)… god damn me and my convincing myself I'm always right.

Disclaimer: I don't own potter. Unfortunately I do own this chapter which refused to post when it should have

It was a dark night, and the only light came from the street lamps illuminating the sidewalks outside every house along Privet Drive. Everything had been silent for several hours until, sensing a movement outside, Petunia Dursley peeked her head around the curtain of the sitting-room to look out, before pulling back in shock. Where there had previously been a perfectly normal stretch of pavement a boy had just appeared, almost as if he had jumped out of thin air. Seconds later another boy with a girl hanging onto his arm joined him, and then a matter of seconds after that another girl jumped out of the air between the two boys. There was something vaguely familiar about the first of the boys but Petunia couldn't place him for the life of her. She heard muttering coming from the group and opened the window a crack so she could hear.

"How was it Gin?" the second boy was asking to the girl who had appeared holding his arm. "I hated the first time I did it, are you okay?"

"I'm fine, stop fussing Ron!" the girl replied, and Petunia could only guess that Gin was some type of nick-name. No-body would have a name like _Gin_, even if they were freaks who appeared in places they had no right to be. "If I was old enough to do it without having the whole ministry down on me I'd have been here ages before you!"

"I doubt that. No-one can beat the master!" the 'master', the boy who had been addressed as Ron, turned to the first boy.

"You sure this is the right place? Looks a bit too _normal_ if you know what I mean. Someone famous couldn't have lived here for sixteen years and it still look this _boring_. I mean, I know you said they were dicks but even total dicks wouldn't live in a shit-hole like this" He gestured wildly towards the houses on the other side of the road.

"Yea, of course this is right. You've been here before remember. When you came to get me that year. And anyway, you're pointing at the wrong side of the street, it's over there." he pointed towards number four, and Petunia shrunk back quickly.

"Oh yea, but it didn't look like this then did it?"

"I think you came round the back that night. Because you had to tell Molly that so she wouldn't go mad at you." the last of the group to arrive stated, though Petunia was now struggling to hear what they were saying, mainly due to the fact that there was a little bit too much for her to take in.

"Didn't stop her though, did it!" the first to arrive laughed, and his laughter was joined by the girl who had arrived with the second boy and she linked her arm in his jokingly. As they passed under the street lamp Petunia could see that both she and the boy called Ron had shocking red hair while what she had taken to be a hat on the other girl was in fact her extremely bushy hair which she appeared to have rolled into a type of bun at the back of her head. The first boy she recognised as soon as he went under the light, and she pulled back her head quickly back around the curtain. What did he think he was doing here huh? He wasn't supposed to come back for ages, not at all if things went right. He shouldn't be there now, especially with a load of people _like_ him. Petunia assumed that was the case because of the way they had all appeared.

"Hello? Aunt Petunia?" the first boy asked, knocking on the door of 4 Privet Drive. "Is anyone home?" He reached forward to knock again but heard a shuffling behind the door and stood back as his cousin came to the door. Harry couldn't help noticing that he had lost a lot of weight since last summer.

"Oh, its you."

"Yep, it's me. And will you tell aunt Petunia that me and my mates are going to be staying tonight. Don't bother trying to say that she's not here, we've just seen her watching us out the curtains."

"No you're not. Mum said you weren't aloud to come here again. She won't let you in."

"Yea, well. We'll just have to see about that, won't we."

"Who is it Dudders?" the voice of Vernon Dursley could be heard in the background, over the sound of the TV and CD that were playing simultaneously.

"It's _him_. He wants to come in with his friends. He says he's going to be staying tonight."

"Tell him to go away, we don't want him here."

"Go away Harry." Harry grinned cheerfully, taking out his wand and pointing it threateningly at Dudley's face.

"Not going to happen Dud. I think I told you me and my mates were staying here tonight, on Dumbledore's orders. And what happens on Dumbledore's orders happens whether you like it or not."

"You, you can't. You're not a-aloud. You'll get expelled f-f-from that freak school you go too, and then you'll be s-s-sorry." he stuttered, obviously not believing what he was saying himself.

"I'm not going back to school, I've got better things to do, but no, you're right, I can't use my wand on you." Harry smiled sneakily. "She can though, cause she's of age. No-one can tell her what to do anymore!"

"Who's she? You're girlfriend?"

"Oy, watch your mouth!" Ron growled, stepping out of the shadows with Hermione, holding his wand outstretched and jabbing it at Dudley playfully. "Do you honestly think anyone in their right minds would have a thing for him?" he ducked hurriedly as Ginny pointed her wand towards his face. Dudley was more than a bit disturbed by how these people threatened each other with their wands, and in a respectable street too.

"Anyway, like we were saying…are you going to let us in or aren't you?" Hermione asked. "Ginny here's very good at the old bat bogey hex, so it's not really like you have much choice."

"Oh, okay then. I suppose you can come in. But mum and dad aren't going to be very happy. And I don't know where you're all going to sleep." It was clear that he was unhappy.

"We'll sort that out ourselves, thank you very much. I'm sure the spare room will suit Ron and Hermione fine, and Ginny can share with me. We're used to it now anyway. Since the twins and Hermione moved back home it's been the only way we could all fit. Is aunt Petunia here, because there's some things I've got to talk to her about."


	4. a muggle and a memory

I spent this week working on a chapter to go between chapter one (No Longer A Child) and chapter two (Darkness Meeting), because I realised I'd skipped a big gap. The chapter deals with how Ginny ends up going with Harry and the Gang but it's not going very well so I'm posting the real chapter three and the in-between chapter will be slotted in when I feel it's up to standard. Also I've only just got a working Floppy Disk, so sorry for the delay.

Disclaimer: Don't own Potter.

Chapter Four: A Muggle and a memory 

"I'll always remember that day like it was yesterday, that day when she told me she was pregnant." Harry was sitting in the lounge of 4 Privet drive talking to his Aunt Petunia, and the talk had just turned to his mother.

"I loved her Harry, whatever it might seem like to you I really did love your mother. She was my only sister and I could never hate her."

"So why did you cut her out of your life then?" Harry asked, his voice cold but no-where near as cold as his heart felt. "If you cared for her so much then why the fuck didn't you keep talking to her huh? And why did you tell Uncle Vernon you hated her and you wished you weren't related to her? Like you'd have really said that if you loved her!"

"Harry, you don't understand, it was tough for me, and for your mother and father too before they died. We pretended we weren't talking so there would be a safe home for you if the worst did indeed come to pass. I know it might have been hard for you but it was what Lilly wanted, and I only ever did what she wanted. I don't think I was physically possible to do anything else, not to my big sister."

"I don't believe you." he replied shortly, looking anywhere but at the face of his aunt.

"I know you don't, but you must Harry, you must, because I remember that night when she told me what was happening for the rest of my life." Petunia moved over to a chest of draws in the corner of the sitting room and took out a crystal basin.

"I'm sure you know what this is, Harry." She said quietly, prodding the contents of the pensive carefully with her finger. Harry didn't even bother to think where she had got it from, there was too much information to process, what with aunt Petunia claiming that she loved his mother and everything. "And I'm sure what I'm going to show you tonight will help you to believe how much I loved your mother." Harry, looked into the pensive and was immediately enraptured by what he saw, and all thoughts of why there was a pensive in Privet drive evaporated into nothingness as he gazed into the crystal depths.

Flashback, seventeen years previously

It was a cold dark night, and there was no sign of life on the road except a solitary figure hurrying towards the cottage near the corner. Once he (or was it a she) reached the door a light appeared in the window and seconds later the door was opened.

"James, it's lovely to see you." the new arrival smiled at the man who had opened the door to her, wrapping her brother-in-law in a tight hug (because it was of course a younger and more filled out Petunia Dursley). "How's Lilly and the little bundle of joy?"

"They're great, I can't get over how amazing it feels to have a child."

"I know, I was in shock for the first few days after having Dudders too, but he's more a daddy's boy than a mummy's boy. He looks like his father already, and I can't see him inheriting any of the old family power." She seemed almost sorrowful at the thought, as if it were a bad thing, this 'family power' as she put it.

"No, I don't see that happening either. It nearly seems too much to wish for, considering who his father is. No offence meant Petunia, but you know what I think of your husband. I only wish you had chosen one of our own rather than a Muggle like him." He frowned, and she understood why really, he felt about her husband the same as her sister did. "You should come in now, it's not safe to be standing out here at times like these, as we understand more than most." He added in an undertone, and then, returning to his normal voice. "Come out of the cold, you must be freezing away."

"Can't say I'm not. I take it you had a boy then, as was expected?" she asked, moving inside the house and settling herself on the settee to wait for her sister.

"Yea, Harry James Godric." James Potter smiled his sister-in-law kindly. "Harry after Lilly's father, Godric after my great-grandfather and James because it's a traditional name in the Potter family."

"That's really lovely." Petunia looked around her, and her voice showed nothing more than pure honest truthfulness. "I'm glad you managed to bring both family traditions into his name. I wanted to do the same with Dudders but Vernon wants to forget about where our family stands."

"Ah, well. I suppose I do understand. If I was in his position I suppose I wouldn't exactly want to remember what my wife's family were, or are, if my wife wasn't Lilly of course. What name did you give him though? Because I always find naming is important. Your name can shape your future."

"Vernon named him, Dudley Mark Dursley. I don't think it suits him but who am I to say. I'm only his mother."

"And what do you think he should be called." James voice was quiet but it was obvious the question was of utmost importance.

"I always though Geoffrey for a boy or Margaret for a girl."

James sighed. "Yes, Geoffrey would have been a good name for a son of yours, for any Evans son, but things can't be changed. Come now, and we'll find Lilly and Harry. I'm sure Lilly will be delighted that you took the time to come and visit us."

"It was the least I could do for my sister."

The memory faded and was replaced by another one, which Harry watched even more closely than the last. The memory he had just seen had opened up a lot more ideas about his family, both his mothers and his fathers, but he was hoping the next memory would unearth the truth of some of the mysteries he was now faced with.

"Dearest Penny, I'm so glad you could come to us today." A young red-haired woman was talking to Petunia Dursley now, though they were sitting in the same room as the last memory. Harry recognised her immediately as his mother, though he had rarely seen a picture of her taken so soon after his birth. He found that it made him want to cry all at once to see her looking so beautiful and young, so like the mother he had always dreamed of.

"You know I wanted you to come today because of some important reason, and following recent developments it is even more important that our conversation is over quickly." Lilly began, and Petunia ushered her to continue. "We must both go away with the right things said between us, the right information stored in our minds, the right promises made, the right vows exchanged."

"Of course, I'm always here with you Lills, no matter what happens you can always trust me. You're my sister and I'll always love you for that, even if my husband doesn't feel the same way."

"Yes, Vernons feelings towards us may cause problems, but you must promise to fight against him with this one thing. Everything else is your decision but you must promise me that whatever happens you will do what I'm about to ask you for."

"I promise Lilly, of course I do. Just please explain, I need to know what it is that you need all my trust for and then get back. I don't mean to sound like I'm in a rush to get away, only I've left Dudley with Arabella Fig, and you know what Vernon thinks of her, even though he doesn't know what she is. That's she's one of us."

Lilly nodded thoughtfully. "You deserve to have him staying with one of us at least, I suppose. I'll tell you what I need to tell you, but it won't be easy for you to hear."

"I'm ready for anything Lills, you might have been the one to go through underneath Dumbledore but I still have the powers to cope with any news you can give me. I love you Lilly, and no matter what happens I will always do my best to protect you and your family."

"I know Penny, I know. And that's why I'm asking you for this." The young Lilly Potter bent her head as if under great strain, and then started talking to her feet.

"My family is in grave danger, I think you've known this for a while really, but recently it's got even worse. You've got to promise me now, that whatever might happen to me or James, no matter what, you will take our Harry and look after him for us. Keep him safe for me, Penny, he means more to us than anyone else in the world."

"I promise, Lilly. I promise more than I could ever promise anything else. If I thought I could then I'd take an unbreakable vow, but you know I can't."

"I know Penny, I know. Your promise is all I need, all I will ever need."

The memory faded and the room, which had been previously filled with tension, relaxed a little bit if not much.

"Do you believe me now Harry?" Petunia asked, looking up gently towards the face of her nephew. "Do you trust now that I loved your mother, that I really cared for her?"

"Yes." Harry whispered in reply. "Yes, I believe you now."

So, what do you think? Please review and let me know.

Loves,

Sam o


	5. Godrics Hollow

5

Chapter five: Godric's Hollow 

A/N: this took a long time to go up because I was working on 'Conversation' which I slotted in as chapter two. Oh, and I had to re-write this whole chapter cause my computer chewed it up! Oh yay!

This chapter includes a minor explanation to the Petunia thing I've got so many reviews about.

DISCLAIMER: Don't own Potter, do own this so called plot.

Harry knelt down on the long grass and started to pull the grass from the overgrown graves. He had done this at every grave he had reached so far, pulling away just enough grass to see the name carved into the headstone before moving onto the next one. He reached up and scratched a bit of dirt of one of the letters of the grave he was bending next to, revealing a name hidden for many years gone by, since the last time anyone had come to visit it so many years ago. James. Scratching hurriedly now he scrabbled away at the grass until the grave was clean, hardly baring to hope after so many false alarms, so many other James's left in neglected graves, that he had found what he was looking for. That maybe, just maybe, this James would be his James. His Father. He finished cleaning the headstone and sat back, his heart pounding as he read the inscription he had uncovered.

_In loving Memory of James and Lillian Potter, who were killed by Voldemort because they loved their son too much to let him die in their place. Your heroic acts shall never be forgotten, and neither will your smiling faces._

He didn't even notice as he slipped to the ground, but he sensed the tears running down his cheeks, and felt the sobs wrack his body. This was too much, too much pain. Harry wondered why he'd ever chosen to do this, to come and find his parents. He'd managed for years without seeing their graves hadn't he. Well, he should have been able to manage again then. Why did he have to choose now to come, now when he had so much more that he had to do? He looked up and saw Ginny coming towards him, and realised, immediately, what he had to do. It had been a mistake to invite her to come, just like his aunt had told him after Ginny had gone up to bed one night, and the conversation replayed itself in his mind.

"_That girl is too young to be out like this Harry, way to young. Talking as your mothers sister and your friend, you're doing her no favours. I'm not your guardian anymore Harry, but I'm still your relation. Just look at her, this isn't right for a girl her age. She should be at home getting ready to sit her NEWT's; she shouldn't be out running around after some bits of soul. Yes, I know about the Horcruxes, because Dumbledore, may his soul rest in eternal peace, kept me informed of everything that was happening. I was your mothers sister after all. But that's not the point, I think you should tell her to go home Harry, it'll just damage you both. It's clear you love her very much, but if you really love her then you'll leave her, because if she stays with you then she'll just get hurt."_

"_I don't know, I don't want her to get hurt, but I don't want to leave her either. And anyway," As if as an afterthought "I know it's a bad time, but how do you know this much about us, how did you manage to hide all this from me for so many years?"_

"_It was hard, but I had to. I don't know why, but it just felt better that way. Even Vernon doesn't know what I am."_

"_So what are you? What are you that you can't tell your own husband about, what are you that's so wrong? What can he think is so bad?"_

_a long pause, in which tension rose in the room until the air was at breaking point. Then. "I'm a squib Harry. I was born into a magical family, same as your mum. But I didn't have the magic. I could never tell Vernon that, could I Harry. Think of what he'd do to me. He'd probably leave me, and take my Dudley with him."_

"_You can't be one of us. It's a physical impossibility."_

"_Is it? Because I didn't think so, and I still don't."_

"_Yea, well I do. Because Mum was a Muggle-born, I've known that since I first started Hogwarts. People used to use that term on her, the one I won't even say. And you, you too. You denied all existence of Magic. How could she be a Muggle-Born if my grandparents were a witch and Wizard?"_

"_Harry, listen to me. Did I ever say my parents weren't? Did anyone ever say they weren't magical? No, they just said that Lilly was Muggle-born, and she practically was Harry. Our parents weren't both Magical Harry, your mother was half blood. Not Muggle-Born, not pure Witch, both. Your grandmother, my old mum, she was the witch in the family. You've never seen pictures of her, have you? When you get back I'll have to show them to you. They're upstairs with all my other things from when I was a child."_

"_I suppose. But, Aunt…"_

"_Call me Petunia, you're an adult now Hunny, not a child. And I might be your aunt, but I also hope I'm your friend."_

"_Oh, okay then. Petunia. Look, what am I supposed to do about Ginny? I mean, I told her she could come. How can I go back on that now?"_

"_I don't know, I honestly don't. I wouldn't want you to hurt her by sending her home, but I can't have her here and you know it. Vernon is angry enough with me for just having you in the house this one night. If she was to stay here any longer I think he'd blow his top and leave!" _

"_I suppose." Harry got up to leave the room, but then turned back as if on an afterthought "Aunt, I mean Petunia."_

"_Yes."_

"_Thanks."_

Harry shook his head to get rid of the memory, and then stood up and turned towards the gate of the graveyard. He knew what he had to do now. Even if his conversation with his aunt hadn't made much sense before it was all clicking into place now. he had needed Ginny with him for this because it was something that would hopefully effect her in years to come, but for the rest of the time until he, there was no point in denying it, died. Well, until then he didn't want her to come with him, he wanted to know that she was safe and not going to get herself hurt.

"Come on, We're leaving!" he almost yelled as he passed Ron and Hermione, running as if his life depended on it. "I'm not staying here anymore!" he started to run, but Ron and Hermione caught him and held him back.

"Harry, what's wrong? Did you find them? Were they there?" Hermione asked, trying to hold him back but Harry shoved her arm off him and continued to run, until he had got out of the graveyard and leant panting against the wall.

"Harry, what happened back there?" Ron asked, frowning worriedly. "I've never seen you go like that before mate, it was scary."

"I couldn't cope." Harry put his head between his knees, looking at the ground as if wishing it would swallow him up, make it that he didn't have to say what he knew was coming next. "Hermione, you've got to do me a favour. I want you to take Ginny back, back to the burrow. And, and leave her there."

"What!" Ginny stared at him, like he'd totally lost his mind. "Harry, you said you wanted me with you, well, I'm going to be with you now okay. You can't go back on a decision like this, you know that as well as I do!"

"I know, Ginny. I know I shouldn't and I know I can't in normal life but you don't understand; we're not in normal life any more. Normal life is a thing from a world where there's no death, but here there is death. Get it, there's death. And there's pain. And I know that me and Ron and Hermione probably aren't going to survive."

"You will survive. You won't die. Even I know that." She sounded almost disgusted by what he had been saying, but Harry knew it was important that she understood the seriousness of the situation.

"No. Ginny, listen to me, we won't. Don't you get it? We won't survive, and the sooner we all come to accept it the sooner we can get on with this. And the sooner we come to accept that there's going to be death along the way the sooner it can be over and you can move on."

"Move on from what?" she asked, and the anger and contempt that had previously filled her voice had disappeared. "What do you want to move on from?"

"I'm sorry." Harry whispered. "I just thought it would be easier if I told you what's going to happen." He felt tears well up behind his eyes again, but forced himself to continue, even through the tears now streaming down his cheeks.

"Ginny, I love you, but if you love me you'll go back home. don't go back for me if you don't want to, go back for your mum. I know she's going to need you before the end of the year when one of us dies. And I want you to do something else for me too, I want you to go to my aunt and uncle when I, when I'm not here any more. And I want you to tell my aunt sorry. I want her to know that I understood and that her words were some of the best advice I had ever got."

Harry could almost see the pain he was causing Ginny but was relieved when, after a long pause, she answered him.

"I don't like it Harry, just like didn't like it the last time. but I understand. And just for the record, if I have to go to your aunt again in my life it wont be to tell her that you're dead, it'll be to tell her that I've asked you to marry me."

Okay. So couldn't resist adding a little bit of fluff at the end there hugs the multicoloured fluff beside her

Reviews are as always greatly appreciated.

Love and peace, (two forces that I have yet to actually see)

The one and only,

Stargazing Maiden.


	6. Castle Of Nightmares

Chapter six: Castle of Nightmares 

Sorry this took a while to get up, we had a holiday and I couldn't find my disk. There might even be another chapter tonight to make up for the delay. Luvs, Akasha.

DISCLAIMER: Don't own Harry Potter.

"So you went back and found the grave then?"

"Yes."

"I wish I could have been there with you, Harry. It's been so many years since I went to pay my respects to your mother and father. I'm sure they'd be so very proud of you if they were still here now."

"Thank you." Harry bowed his head and looked at the ground, talking to his feet rather than the woman sitting opposite him. "But I don't know, I never really knew my parents. And while I'm doing this for them, I'm also doing this for Sirius, and for professor Dumbledore too. Do you think they? Do you think…"

"They're proud of you too Harry, I'm sure of it. Albus always spoke of you with the greatest respect, and Sirius loved you like the son he never had. I'm positive that they're proud of you, wherever they are now."

"Thanks. That's all I wanted to know."

"I'm glad you feel comfortable to come here, Harry. But do you think I can't tell how you're feeling to be back in these halls? Do you think I can't see the pain you're going through? I might have been your teacher before, Harry, but I hope you will consider me as your friend now. This place was the place you were when you found of the death of the closest thing to a parent you ever had, and it was the place you came to and found out about your parents too. You've seen your friends and mentors killed by people in this very building Harry, and I respect you for being able to bare the burden of coming back to visit us." She paused and looked at him, seeing years of pain reflected in him, and then continued, realising that to make him stop and remember would be more a cruelty than a good. "And remember, so long as Hogwarts is under my control you're free to come and go as you please. You can go back to the Gryffindor common room or we'll set you up with a room, but I hope you'll stay here with us, at least for a while."

"Thank you professor, I might just take you up on that offer, if you wouldn't mind. There are some things I'd like to do about the Village in the next few weeks and it would be hard to find lodgings. I will, of course, pay my keep." He got up to leave, but the teacher gestured back to his seat.

"It's Minirva, Harry, now you're not a student here any more. And of course you won't have to pay to stay here. This castle is your home for as long as you may need it, and no-body pays to live in their own home. I'll send words to the kitchens to make your bed in the tower again. And I assume Mr Weasley and Ms Granger will be staying along with you too?" she waited for Harry's nod of confirmation, and then continued. "Good, I'll get their beds made up too."

"Thank you." Harry got up to leave once again and Professor McGonnigal followed him, pausing just before room and catching his shoulder.

"Oh, and Harry?"

"Yes."

"I expect to see you at the staff table for breakfast in the morning, but after that you're free to come and go as you please."

Next morning

"Harry!"

"Potter, nice to see you again mate!"

"What happened to not coming back huh? Just can't keep away from us!"

"Welcome back, you never could stand to come on the train with the rest of us!" the calls followed Harry from the moment he stepped out of the Gryffindor common room in the morning and he replied to them all in the same way, with a nod and a smile. The few people he'd wanted to talk to and discuss things with he'd made a point of finding in the common room the night before and talking to then. They'd all taken his reason for coming back fairly well too, considering that he hadn't actually given the right reason. Well, he'd give _a _right reason, just not the one his life was basing itself around. He'd told them that he'd come back to Hogwarts so he could use the library to look up curses and things what he might need in the battle. But he hadn't mentioned that he also wanted to use Hogwarts as a safe base to do as much research into the nature of the Horcruxes and to get his energy up for the fight that he knew was going to come, and to find out as much as he could about _RAB_. Hermione was going to be going to classes while she was staying in the castle and acting like a normal NEWT student and so was Ron, but for Harry classes were to be a thing of the past.

He slowly made his way past the Gryffindor table and along to the staff table, moving towards the seat left vacated for him beside Professor McGonnigal, who now occupied the centre chair. Ignoring the stares he was now getting he took his seat and looked down at his plate, trying to avoid the gazes of his fellow students. People who, until ten weeks ago he had been one of, been part of the crowd. Now he was alienated from them by a big gap, one that wasn't just the physical gap of sitting apart from them but also the mental of the burden of knowing what he had to do, knowing how he was likely to die and that even if he did survive he'd be a murderer.

He sat at that table for about five minutes in silence, avoiding the stares of his fellow students and imagining that he was somewhere else, somewhere other than this place in front of them all, and as soon as Professor McGonnigal gave him leave he jumped from his seat and ran out the door. It wasn't that he didn't want to be in Hogwarts, he was glad to be there. Just all these people looking at him was a bit too much, he needed to be alone to think.

Running down the lawns of the castle to the lake Harry looked back and saw Hogwarts castle glinting in the sunlight of the cold September morning. It was beautiful, and he wondered how come he never really appreciated its beauty when he was a student there. It was probably just part of the magic, that once you left you realised how much you missed it and how beautiful it really was. He couldn't stop running though, and he understood that now. He would have to keep on running until he found peace, and god only knew how long that would be. He heard footsteps running behind him but carried on going, concentrating on not where he was going but just _going_. After a few minutes he sensed the footsteps stop and drew to a halt, looking up to see where he had come. He brought his eyes up slowly and then blinked twice, not really realising what he was seeing. Because there in front of him, was the image of perfection. The smiling and peaceful face of non other than Albus Dumbledore, framed in crystal with a phoenix resting on his chest. Harry reached out hesitantly and ran his fingers across the crystal surface, part of him wishing that it would melt away and that he could embrace his mentor one last time. Because that was what Dumbledore had been to him, he'd been a mentor and a father since the moment Harry entered Hogwarts for the first time. Even before that to some extent, because of course Dumbledore had been looking out for Harry when Harry was still a baby, wasn't it Dumbledore who had placed to charm on him that made him safe when he was with the Dursleys. Yea, when Harry thought about it Dumbledore had been his father through it all, helping him from a distance rather than by having a major physical part in his life. He had always been there in the background making sure things were running smoothly and giving him a helpful push in the right direction when it looked like he needed it. Just being here now was sad, and Harry found himself wishing he wasn't here, that he was anywhere else. But that was wishful thinking and now he was here he might as well do what he had come to do, say goodbye to this man that had been so much to him.

"Sir." Harry whispered, sinking to the ground beside the crystal tomb. "Sir, why? Why did you have to go like this? Why did you trust him?" but as predicted no answer came save the rustling of the wind through the trees. This was life, the life Harry had accepted for himself when he decided that he would follow the prophesy, and though he regretted it a lot there was no way he could go back and change things now. Looking back up at the tomb once more he wiped the tears away from his eyes and got up, turning back towards the castle and the home he never had.


	7. Hardly A Decission

Chapter seven: Hardly a Decision 

Next chapter, god I'm really enjoying this fic now. This chapter doesn't follow Harry though; this chapter is about the Dursleys and the side of their lives you never see. Also, I'm a few chapters ahead of myself on this, so expect maybe another chapter next week, or tomorrow even if you're lucky.

Disclaimer: I don't own Potter.

"Petunia. Is this true?" Vernon Dursley looked up from the paper he had apparently been reading and looked towards the kitchen.

"Is what true Vernon." Mrs Dursley asked, leaning her head around the door. Then, seeing what he was holding "Oh, has something interesting happened that I should know about?"

"Yes, and no. Well, it's definitely news, and you _should _know about it. It just shouldn't have happened."

"Well, what shouldn't have happened?" Petunia asked, pretending to have no clue what he was talking about but already guessing what was to come. It was something she had been expecting for a while now.

"You let him stay in our house. The weekend I was away on business. You said that you'd only let him in for a few minutes so I left. But you didn't make him go away, did you?"

Petunia didn't answer.

"You did, didn't you. You let that, that filthy, that filthy little dog turd. You let him stay in my house, after I forbade you too. You had him in this house, maybe even sitting on my chair. And you didn't even have the honesty and respect to apologise to me. I can hardly bare to say his name and you let him into my home!"

She spoke now, and her voice shook. "Why should I apologise Vernon? My nephew was out in the cold; I wasn't going to leave him to freeze at night. You would have done the same in that situation, or at least I hope you would have."

"He's scum. He deserves to be frozen, he deserves to die!" Mr Dursley almost spat the words at his wife and she drew back in horror.

"Vernon. How could you? He's my nephew, _your_ nephew." Although she was shaking inside her voice remained steady as he replied her. There was no reason to let her fear out into the open, that would just aim to aggravate him more.

"He's no nephew of mine. I hate him Petunia, and so do you. You're too charitable, that's your problem. If you weren't so charitable then we would never have had to take him in the first place, and definitely not after he went away to that freak school. His whole family was freaks. Your family, his family. It all boils down to the same thing. They were freaks. You were the only one to come out normal from it!" he spat the word freak at her, as if it might contaminate him. And then, standing up he turned to hear her stuttered reply.

"Vernon, please. Don't do this to me. Don't talk about my family that way. I loved them, Vernon." Then as his fist came up she cowered down "Vernon, please don't. Please. I didn't mean to do anything wrong."

"Its too late for that now, isn't it!" he almost yelled as he flung his fist down at her face and felt it connect with a satisfying crunch. "You disobeyed me when I gave you clear instructions. Is that the type of wife I want? I want a wife that does what I say, not one that has people I hate in my house the moment my back was turned."

"Vernon, please. I don't hate your family, why can't you accept mine for who they are?" She asked through tears.

"I can't accept freaks Petunia, you've known me long enough to know that. I don't even want to accept you, I'm only accepting that you're here because of my son, and because of what people at work would say."

"So you don't love me then?" She asked and her voice shook even though she had expected the answer for many years now.

"I never loved you, you whore. I took you in because you were having my child but if it hadn't been for that you would have been out on the streets long ago. better still, you would have never com2 into my house. You would have stayed on the streets where I found you with your good-for-nothing family."

"Maybe I would have been better off if that was what happened." Her voice shook, but it was with anger now. "For years now I've kept myself under control, keeping my family ties and the things I inherited from them out of the way and out of your sight."

"What are you on about you stupid witch whore."

"Witch, exactly Vernon." She hissed, and her fist balled into her handbag. "Just because I didn't go through Hogwarts, just because I didn't get a diploma in Magic, just because I was never schooled because I wasn't good enough. I'm still a Witch Vernon. I loved you, or I thought I loved you, so I stopped using magic, started living as a 'normal' person, hid my knowledge of the world I had grown up in. but today it's got too much Vernon, you've stepped over the line by having a go at me for letting Harry stay for one night. He's my dead sisters Son, of course I was going to let him stay with me." She reached down into her handbag with her right hand and pulled out of its depth a long thin willow stick and muttered a few words before the tip ignited. Then, starting at her quivering husband, she raised it and muttered a few well chosen words 'mortomer locomotus'. A bead of aquamarine light shot from the end of the wand and hit him in the chest, sending him flying backwards into the couch, where he floated several inches above it, unconscious. Mortomer Locomotus, the most difficult and advanced spell untaught Petunia Evans could remember, a spell to knock someone out and leave them hovering. She stepped towards him and looked down for a few seconds, before turning and heading upstairs, calling to Dudley as she went.

"Dudders, pack your bags. We're leaving."

Okay, what do you think? Short chapter I know but I'm having blocks and it was important I got this bit into the story at this point…explanation in later chapters. Mortomer Locomotus is part made up from a spell from the books 'Locomotus' the hovering charm. Mortomer I thought sounded like Mort, which is death in French (I think, but don't rely on it). But it's not quite the same, hence unconscious.

Anyway, reviews appreciated.

Love and peace,

Stargazing Maiden.


	8. Homecoming

Chapter eight: Homecoming 

In which Harry goes back to the Dursleys to the shock of his life. I am fully aware that this chapter is very short, but that's because I wrote it in when I should have been writing chapter ten. This was going to be a memory, but then I thought, well, its kind of important so should go in on its own.

Harry stopped and knocked on the door of Number Four Privet Drive. There was no reply to he opened the door and walked into the hall, surprised to find that something had changed. It wasn't a physical change as much as a change in the atmosphere, but there was certainly something different.

"Hello? Aunt Petunia?" he called, looking around himself nervously. "Dudley?"

"They're not here." Came the muffled reply from the sitting room, and Harry advanced slowly, not recognising the voice.

"Hello? Who is it? What are you doing in my aunts house?" he asked nervously.

"This house was never isn't and never will be your aunts house!" Vernon Dursley came running through the sitting room door, his face red. "What do you think you're doing here huh? Didn't I tell you that if you came here again it would be the last anyone ever saw of you!" He cried in a wheezing voice, but Harry was unperturbed. At least it explained what the strange voice was coming from his aunts house, even if it didn't explain where she was.

"Uncle Vernon?" he asked, his voice stronger than he felt. "Where is my aunt? Where is Petunia?"

"She took him! She took him and left me here! The evil witch thought I could fend for myself; left me to manage affairs. And not one thought as to what the Neighbours would think! I hate her! I'm glad she's gone. Good Riddance!" he broke down into more sobs and Harry looked on in disgust. It was pretty obvious what had happened, but the venom Vernon Dursley seemed to have against his wife surprised him. It was clear that something had gone wrong and that Petunia had walked out, and apparently she had taken her son with her. Well Harry could understand why she would leave her husband, but why she would take her son with her was something he was having problems with understanding.

"Mr Dursley. For Christ's sake. _Do you know where they went_?" he asked over the sound of sobs coming from the pitiful man lying at his feet.

"I don't know, do I!" he hissed in reply. "She said something about relations up north and upped and left the same night. God only knows what she's doing to my poor son, with freaks like you running around all over the place!"

"What do you mean 'Freaks Like Me?" he asked nervously. "Vernon. What are you not telling me about my family? What is there I need to know?"

"Nothing you need to know!" Mr Dursley hissed triumphantly. "Just little details about your grandparents that don't matter. That's where she's gone. She's ran to the parents she's claimed to hate for seventeen years, ran away to them like I knew she would at the moment things started to go anything but perfect. That woman is a bitch, pure and simple. I'm better off without her! Look how well I'm keeping the house now she's not around! Go on, Look!"

Harry looked around the house, but it wasn't necessarily to pay attention to what his uncle was telling him. His mind was reeling, the idea that he had grandparents still alive was shocking and it was taking a while to sink in. could it really be true, could the grandparents, the parents of his own mother, still be alive somewhere. Was it really possible that he wasn't so much an orphan as he had always though? Could is grandparents really be out there, waiting for him to come and find him?

"Where are they?" he asked Mr Dursley, his voice shaking. "Where are my grandparents. And if you don't tell me I'm going to curse you. I'm not afraid too."

"Ha. That bitch said the same thing, and she did it as well. But I don't know if you have the guts." Then, after a few minutes. "But I don't really want you sticking around here messing up my style, so I might as well tell you. They've gone to Ireland. They were from Ireland originally, but they moved over here when your bitch of a mother started at her school. And when she _blew up_ they went back there. That's where my bitch of a wife is now, and my bastard of a son who always took after her way too much. I always said she was spoiling the lad, but now he's her responsibility, and I couldn't care less if she spoils him or treats him like a little god. Because he's not my responsibility any more! He's hers. All hers!" he broke down into more sobs, and Harry was painfully aware that no matter how many problems his uncle had he really had loved his son, and didn't want to loose him. But the most shocking thing, even more than that, was that it was obvious he wanted them both dead, all of them.

"I'm leaving now." Harry spoke shortly, partly because he didn't want to waste his breath on this waste of a man, but also because he didn't want to be given the chance to feel pity, and then turned and left the house. He turned back as he reached the end of privet drive, and was shocked and disgusted to see Vernon Dursley leaning out of the window, crying as he walked away down the road into his future.


	9. RAB and the introduction of a Krum

Chapter eight: RAB and the introduction of a Krum 

In which I introduce a Rowling Original ship that most people forget about or hate because its not the one they like (I don't normally either), and bring in one of my future major characters. And also in which I introduce my own views of who RAB is, and back it up with facts from the books. Any reference to current situations means nothing, it is not intentional. I've just read over what I've written so far and its pretty much like I'm angling my feelings into this story. It is unintentional.

Disclaimer: Don't own Harry Potter

There's not many people in life who I care for more than you. You mean more to me than the world. I love you, will you marry me?"

"What?"

"I said 'can I borrow a quill.'" Harry smiled hesitantly at her, and Ginny shook her head. She had been dreaming again and had totally misheard what Harry said to her.

"Yea, sure. Don't have to ask." She mumbled, handing him the quill and then turning her head away. it felt weird to have Harry in Gryfendor common room when he didn't sit with them at meals anymore. The few days he was even in the school for meals he sat at the staff table, but normally he chose to eat away, often skipping breakfast altogether and leaving the castle as soon as he was dressed.

Ginny knew not to ask questions though, and even the other students had worked out not to ask after the first few weeks. They acted like Harry wasn't part of the school anymore, and it was weird to think that they were just treating him how he was. Not a student anymore. An adult.

Even when he was in the castle he spent his time hiding in the library and looking up curses, counter curses and any information he could about the identity of RAB. Hermione and Ron were helping him when they could, but because they were preparing to sit their NEWTs it was kind of hard for them to put much time into anything.

Hogwarts had changed a lot since the summer, and Ginny wasn't the only person to notice. For one they had another new potions master, this a young woman called Professor Con. And all the students had been surprised when, on their first Defence Against The Dark Arts class of the year, they had been greeted by non other than Victor Krum. Krum, who they were now forced to call 'Professor', seemed to be adjusting well to life in Hogwarts. Well, he had been found to be spending more than the recommended amount of time with some of the older students, the ones he'd met on his previous trip to Hogwarts for the Triwizard Tournament. But apart from that he was a fair teacher, and Ginny found the work they were doing in his class to be better than most of the other stuff she'd learned under her previous teachers. She looked up and smiled as Hermione sat down beside her.

"How's the study going?"

"Okay…" came the distracted reply.

"Oh." Then, grinning cheekily. "And how's _professor_ Krum doing?"

"He's great." she replied without thinking, and then looked up, horrified. "Oh god Ginny, I did not just say that."

"Yea, you did." Ginny grinned at her. "And don't worry, I won't tell Ron."

"Thanks Gin. Its not like there's anything serious between me and Ron even though I'd like there to be. I mean, Ron's great. He's just so…I don't know. I keep giving him hints and he just doesn't see them."

"I know. my brothers stupid. You don't have to tell me."

"He's not stupid…he's just slow." Hermione grinned, and then called Harry back as he got up to leave, muttering something about how he didn't need to hear this girly conversation any more than they wanted him to hear it.

"Harry, wait a min. I found something out."

"Oh yea. About what." He wasn't in the mood to hear her girlish giggilyness.

"RAB." Hermione said, and Harry spun round.

"What? You, you know who he or she is?"

"I think so." she smiled awkwardly. "Harry. RAB, Regulus Amelius Black."

"Who?" He asked, though the name rang a bell.

"He was Sirius' brother." She explained. "Harry, it all fits. They say Voldemort killed Regulus when he tried to get away from being a death eater. But of course no-body believed that he was really killed by Voldemort even though they had no proof, but what if he was, what if this was why."

"That could work I suppose, it really could. But how do you know? How are you so sure?"

"I'm sure because…I found this." She grinned triumphantly and then held out a piece of parchment. "It was in one of the books I got from Grimmauld place over the summer, but I only found it last night. I think it proves my point, and I think it'll be a help to you too." Harry took the parchment and looked down at it, reading slowly through the difficult to decipher handwriting.

_My name is Regulus Black, and this is my death letter. By the time anyone reads this, if anyone reads this, I will be dead. But hopefully I will not have died in vain. Hopefully I will have taken a part of this monster that is ruling the world with me. I'm here now, in the cave, and I don't know how many enchantments I've fought through to get this far. All I know is that I've got this far, and now I know that I'm here, that I'm going to die but I'm going to take a part of him with me. I know what it will take, because it is as I saw when I looked into the crystal ball (who said Divination was a waste of time), and I also know what form it will take. It will be in the form of a necklace, which I will take with me to my watery grave with the infiri. I know that's how I'm going to die, I think I've known it since I first realised they were there, known that my death lay with them. But I will take a part of him with me once I send this letter back with the spell my mother gave me, that whatever I apply the spell too returns to our family home in London. And so, with these final words, I Regulus Amelius Black, bane of the Dark Lord, give myself unto my cause, and say goodbye to those I love._

_In memorandum,_

_Regulus Black._

"So?" Hermione asked when Harry laid the letter back on the table between them. "Do you think my point is proven?"

"He was Sirius brother." Harry whispered. "He was Sirius brother, and we thought he was bad. We should have known he wasn't really…he was Sirius brother."

"I know Harry, but then maybe its just part of their family that they have to be falsely accused before they can come into their own light."

"Hmm, maybe." Harry looked up as the portrait hole opened behind them, and was greeted by the surly face of Victor Krum.

"Hermy-own-Ninny, Harry. I vas just coming to find you. Harry, I vas vondering, if you're not too busy, if you vould honour me with a game of Quidditch. And Hermy, maybe you could come too."

Harry grinned.

"Yea, that'd be great. you coming _Hermy_?" she nodded, and they got up and walked out of the common room towards the Quidditch pitch, and Harry realised that there was something he'd missed more than being back at Hogwarts, and that was getting out and relaxing on the pitch.


	10. Empty Skys

Chapter Ten: Empty Skies 

In which Harry reacquaints himself with his old friend the firebolt, and falls in love once more. This chapter originally contained the section which is now Chapter eight: Homecoming.

DISCLAIMER (even though there's no point really): J.K Rowling owns Potter, not me.

PEOPLE: I am staying with my aunt. Who has the internet. And I have all my work with me. And another chapter ready to come. So when I get a review you'll get the next chapter!

It felt good to get out on the pitch again after so long, and Harry relished the feel of the firebolt under him, responding to his every command almost before he gave it. Although he could have been spending all his time flying if he felt like it Harry had in reality spent very little time in the air. There were exams to be studying for, research to do and people to see. Because although he wasn't an official student anymore Harry still wanted to sit his NEWTS and get some type of qualifications. Even though he had very little doubt in his mind that he was going to die fighting Voldemort, his friends were refusing to accept this eventuality, and he felt that he couldn't let them down by doing nothing for himself. And anyway, when he wasn't working on something really important Harry preferred to be doing something productive. Just sitting in the Gryfendor common room was boring, and it also left him way too much time to think about things he didn't want to think about. Sure, the twins might have loved sitting around doing nothing when they were at school, but it wasn't for Harry… He needed to be being productive at all times.

There had been quite a lot of contact between Harry and the twins since he'd come back to school. They'd managed to get the extra shop opened up in Hogsmead and had been spending a lot of time there 'because its closer to the order'. Ha. But Harry knew the truth, after he'd been having a drink with them one night and overheard them joking about it. There were problems in the London shop, which neither of them could be bothered to deal with. At first the measures they'd taken to put up with shoplifters had been tolerated quite well, but then the authorities started to get involved, and things started to get messy.

Flashback, the night before

"It was that bloody bastard of a Higgins." The first thing Fred had said about it when Harry questioned them. "His son tried to nick one of our fanged Frisbee's so we offered him a punching eyeglass for free. Of course we didn't give him the ointment to fix it, and next thing we know we've got the full authorities down on us for 'selling a dangerous product.'"

"God, we all know those things aren't dangerous!" Harry grinned; imagining anyone with one of the Weasleys famous bruises was guaranteed to bring out a smile.

"Yeah, well obviously we showed them the ointment when they came a asking, and we all had a bit of a laugh about it." George had continued for his brother. "But Higgins wasn't having it, and kept making a fuss. So we had to promise not to sell any vaguely dangerous objects."

"So you came up here!" Harry couldn't help grinning.

"Yuh-huh, everyone in Hogwarts knows to ask if there's anything else needed before they buy our stuff, and they know they won't come to any harm from it. Hey, do you remember, even McGonnigal praised us over some of our work!"

Back to present

"Harry? You okay?" Hermione sped up beside him from where she had been flying below. It was strange to see her on a broom even though they'd been travelling around a lot together lately, and it still made him feel weird.

"Yeah. I'm fine!" Harry grinned. "Nothing wrong here, I've just got a few little things going on in my mind."

"Oh don't we all!" she laughed, and then sped away to the other side of the pitch, turning back to call to him. "Victor says he'll race you three times round the pitch if you want, or you can have a go at catching the snitch from the last world cup!"

Harry laughed, and soared straight up into the air and then back down nearly to the ground, in the wronski feint he'd first seen at the cup so many happy summers ago. On the ground Krum kicked open the crate and for a few moments Harry could see the golden glow of the walnut sized ball speeding away, but it was lost almost seconds later.

"Let the fight begin." He laughed towards Krum where he was circling the other side of the pitch."

"Your on." the muffled reply came from his opponent, and they both started of on their missions. The race was on.

Okay, know it took forever, but I had really bad writers block. That is also my very bad excuse for the crappyness of this chap. So yeah, keep reviewing. Please 

Love always,

Sam x


	11. Respect

Chapter Eleven: Respect 

Okay, okay, I know I promised this last night… but I got side-tracked, and according to myself this is the last chapter I really have left before I have to start writing again… so this is the last really quick chapter… unless I get off bebo and start writing. Anyway, loves ya all. Oh, and thanks to my gorgeous reviewer, I owe ya one!

Disclaimer: I don't own Potter, and to tell ya the truth, I think everyone kind of knows that already.

"Harry! Hermione! Ron!"

"Hagrid. I hope we find you well?"

"Never better. I've been feeling right lonely without you lot coming down to visit me like you used to."

"Yeah, well, you know how it is." Harry replied stiffly, stepping inside the small cabin, and Ron closed the door behind them. It wasn't that he had a problem with Hagrid, but Harry was still finding any contact with friends of his old headmaster painful. There were one too many memories connected to Hagrid for Harry to ever feel truly comfortable in his company again, and he felt guilty for that! He wanted to like Hagrid, he wanted to be able to count him as a friend, but it just wasn't happening. Not as well as it should have. Sure, he still respected Hagrid, but how could he ever truly feel comfortable with someone who had trusted Snape. How could he feel comfortable with someone who hadn't believed him when he said that Dumbledore was dead? Would anyone in their right minds really joke about something like that! Harry thought not, because his loss was still pounding on his heart, filling his every sense.

"You okay, Harry?" Hagrid asked, directing him to a seat by the table. There was a certain formality about him, which Harry found more un-nerving that anything he had experienced so far.

"I'm fine." He muttered, turning his head away from his old friend and instead staring out of the window, noticing for the first time a mound of earth covered in flowers. Somehow it hit him, though he had forgotten before, that they had buried a spider in the garden with professor Slughorn. He couldn't help smiling at the memory, remembering how happy Slughorn had been because of the venom.

Ron followed Harry's eyes, and then turned to Hagrid, grinning.

"Since when have you been into planting flowers!"

"What?" Hagrid asked, looking up from the kettle. "Oh, yeah. They're not mine. Professor Slughorn, since he was staying on at the school, said he'd do something. Since he was at the funeral as well, he said he would like to give the grave a little touch, to make it look better.

"Good venom then." Harry couldn't help muttering under his breath, but luckily no-one but Hermione seemed to hear, and she knew not to ask questions. Harry had no love for Slughorn, but it was clear that he had a lot more respect for him since he had found out how bad some people really could be. And since he'd stopped being invited to the slug club meetings, but it wasn't like he had ever wanted to go to them.

"How's Krum fitting in then?" Hagrid asked Hermione, settling down at the table and pouring the tea, passing Harry of as a lost case just as much of the world were. "I've hardly had a chance to speak to him since we got back, too much work to do trying to settle the school down after, well, after Dumbledore." He turned his head away to hide the sobs, and Harry felt a bit more pity for him, but not much. Hermione patted his shoulder nervously.

"Hagrid, we know. We're all going through the same thing. You think things are any easier living in the castle? Half the school hasn't come back, and the ones who have are half afraid to walk down the corridors or to get their post in the mornings. It's not only the staff that has felt the difference. Remember, there's students who were close to him as well, there's students here who grew up believing that he was indestructible, there's students here who's parents believed that he was indestructible. Hagrid" she lowered her voice "look at Harry, Dumbledore was like a father to him, however distant a father he was. He's been the only person looking over Harry all his life. Its broken him Hagrid, he's a broken person."

"I know." Hagrid stole a glance at Harry, where he was staring out of the window at the lake, but not really seeing it, lost in his own thoughts. "I've always said Dumbledore was the best thing that ever happened to Harry, the only good thing in a horrible life of pain. Who else does he have really, apart from you and Ron? He doesn't want me to be there for him anymore and to tell you the truth I don't think it would do him much good if he did. I know I'm broken, and I think everyone else can see that too. You know Minirva McGonnigal is only just starting out, but she's an amazing headmistress, and even she told me it wasn't going to do any good me trying to help him."

"I knew she would do good." Ron joined in "Hey, Hagrid. Did you paint the place or something? It looks different."

"You noticed!" He grinned joyously. "Well, after that fire I had to do something to make the place better, we were pretty much burned out. I had to re-build the back wall, but it needed it anyway, the place was falling to pieces."

"It looks good." Harry looked up from where he had been playing with a hole in the tablecloth. "You've done a good job." He got up and went to the door.

"You leaving already?"

"Yes. I have to get back to the school, there's some things I've got to do. Ron? Hermione?" they got up and followed him out the door, and Hagrid followed behind them.

"Hey, you forgot your tea!"

"We'll come back soon." Hermione smiled apologetically then followed a retreating Harry. She knew the visit was going to be awkward for him, but he could have been a bit more polite.


	12. Lies

Chapter Twelve: Lies 

I always saw myself as a bit of a Luna Lovegood, so this is a little something about Luna and Neville, since I promised right at the beginning of this that they'd come into the story. Not much, just a little something to keep you interested, and because I'm stuck on where to take the next chapter. I know the plot, just not how it all fits together.

Disclaimer: I don't own Potter, though if I did I wouldn't complain.

"Hey Luna."

"Hey Neville." She smiled at him, and tentatively reached out and took his hand. Although they'd been seeing each other for all summer she was still a little bit shy around him. She liked him good enough, but to Luna finding a boyfriend after having no friends for so many years felt like a dream and one she didn't really understand. She loved it though, because Neville was someone she finally felt accepted around, someone she felt comfortable with.

"You spoken to Harry Potter or Hermione Granger much since you got back?" she asked. "I haven't really had a chance yet."

"No, me neither." He grinned sheepishly. "I mean, I've spoken to them, but mostly just Hermione and Ron. And sometimes Ginny. But Harry doesn't really come to classes anymore."

"No." She sighed. "I guess he's too busy off saving the world… it's a pity though."

"Pity?"

"Well, yeah. I mean, he's really good at school, and he should be doing something a bit more worth while. Not that saving the world isn't worth while, but with some proper qualifications he could be really doing something to help. He could get the ministry to stop testing on animals. He could even prove the existence of the crumple horned snorlack if he was _really _into his work!"

Neville just grinned… what could you really say to a girl like that. He knew, deep in his heart, that saving the world was more important than anything else, but the way she put it made everything seem so simple. Even though Harry was the only person who could save the world, what was a world without the animals, mythical or real. What was the world when the government were corrupt. It was those simple yet hard hitting facts that really seemed to get to him, make him love her. Because he did love her, more than he thought was possible. And he knew, somewhere in him, that he needed to tell her that. But he couldn't. no matter how hard he tried he really couldn't tell her. There was too much pain and suffering attached to love in his life that the idea of opening up again was not only frightening, but dangerous.

_Flashback, first year_

"_I really like her."_

"_Who? Parvati?"_

"_No. Hermione."_

"_Oh."_

"_Well. Is that all you can say? I don't know what to do. And you say oh."_

"_Well. She's only a girl."_

"_Only a girl to you. But I think I'm in love with her."_

"_Please. What do you know about love?"_

"_I know that's what I feel for her."_

"_You realise you haven't got a hope in hell."_

"_Why not?"_

"_Because. She's smart. And you. Well, you're not Neville."_

"_You don't have to tell me that. I know I'm not clever. But why should that make any difference."_

"_I don't know Neville. It's hard to explain. But clever girls go for clever people. And she's very pretty."_

"_What's her being pretty got to do with anything?"_

"_Well. It's hard to explain. But, well, she could have anyone."_

"_You mean you don't think I stand a chance."_

"_Basically mate, yeah. That is what I think."_

"_Oh thanks." Neville Longbottom turned and walked out of the Gryffindor boys dormitory, turning his back on his so called friend. Behind him Seamus Finnigan turned his back and continued to put up his football posters. Not a care in the world_

_back to present_

it wasn't a stupid reason why Neville was afraid to admit he was in love though. It was honest. He knew it was. And he knew it was the truth. And then, because of that, as he thought back on the horrific memory of his first week of school, he became brave, and the Gryffindor lion awoke on him. Squeezing the hand of his girlfriend he bent down and as his lips met hers for the first real time he whispered softly

"I love you, Luna."

Lil bit of fluff at the end. I know it's a bit confusing. But I feel fluffy cause my boyfriend just told me that he believes I'm the ONE! So yeah, I'm feeling fluffy. Next chapter when get reviews.


	13. Letters From Home

Chapter Thirteen:

**Chapter Thirteen: ****Letters From Home**

Hey people, guess who's back. And I'd just like to take this opportunity to apologies for the long and extremely boring absence from your screens. I'd love to go into details, but I think I did that in the message I sent out last week. So here, as promised, is the next chapter. Having not re-read this in a while, I find that I actually quite like this. Hopefully you will all agree with me :D  
DISCLAIMER: though I wish I owned Harry Potter, I'm afraid I don't.

"Dearest Harry" he frowned at the scribbled writing. Since when had his aunt called him 'dearest'? In all his time at Hogwarts he had rarely received more than a few words from her, and yet this was the second full letter since he had returned this year. He supposed, since she left her husband and admitted to her past. But one thing hadn't changed, she still chose to write at the most inappropriate moments. He looked back down at the page, and continued reading.

"I hope my letter finds you well. Dudley went home to Vernon yesterday, he told me that he thought he would be happier there. Its sad for me, but I suppose he's right, he was always more his fathers son than mine. God knows anyone could have been more like his father than me. Now I look back I can't see what I found attractive about that life, but I suppose everyone thinks differently in hindsight. If I had thought differently after your mother died maybe your whole life would have been different. Maybe. But then maybe not, because Vernon would have never aloud me to leave, and then I wouldn't have even been able to look after you as much as I did. As much, or as little.

I'm living in Ireland at the moment, with some friends of my parents, your grandparents. I find it relaxing after all my time living with your Uncle, because the people I am staying with are witches themselves, but they have children in a small school in this country. I suggested they sent them to Hogwarts but I think the whole family feels better with them living closer to home. Personally I know I would feel the same. As much as Dudders was his fathers son, he was still my baby too. Maybe he didn't turn out the way I imagined, but then when can we really imagine what someone is to become. And he is his own person, we can never argue that about him. He's become something completely different to his family traditions, at least our side of the family anyway. Its strange to see how like his father he really is, because I always deep down hoped that he would turn out like us, but knew that even if he did he would never have been aloud to go to Hogwarts. Your uncle would have forbade it, and I would have felt more comfortable with him nearer to home anyway.

The last time I saw you, you were strongly considering not sitting your exams. I think you should still go for them. I know you don't believe you'll still be here this time next year, but just in case, just hypothetically speaking, you might want to put your grades somewhere in your priorities. Even if its just for Ginny's sake, because I know that girl loves you, and I know that if you at least pretend things are okay then it will make her feel a lot better. And right now, whatever you might think, that girl, her feelings for you and your feelings for her, those are the only things that really matter. I think you made the right decision to leave her when you did, but I still think that you too need each other. Don't take her with you on any of your exhursions, but don't leave her in the dark either. Let her know what you're doing. It will make all your lives a lot easier in the long run.

I know this letter must seem weird to you, since we've never been close before, but I would love if we could be now. Or if not close, at least on talking terms. I'm sure it would work out, and it would mean a lot to me. But I'm sure that whatever you choose your mother would be very proud of you.

Please try and write back to me as soon as you can, I'm sure Hedwig will be able to find me.

I am, as always,

Petunia.

He frowned at the letter, wishing that it would burst into flame in front of him. But it had been years since he'd made anything burst into flame without meaning too, and even if he had meant to he wasn't quite adapt at non-verbal incantations yet. There was no reason for him to be so furious really, but maybe it was just the effect of having his aunt writing to him like they were best friends, after so many years of her treating him like he didn't exist. He would never be able to get on great with her, no matter how much she wanted them to be true friends. Sure, he might be able to acknowledge her occasionally now, more than he had ever wanted to do before, but they would never be soul buddies.

"You alright Harry?" Ron Weasley asked, sticking his head around the office doorway. Harry still slept in Gryffindor tower, but he had his own office in one of the unused corridors too. It meant that he could have the privacy he desired while still being part of the main school.

"Yeah, I'm fine mate. Why do you ask?" Harry forced a grin at his red headed best mate, and silently swore to himself. Why did all the interruptions have to come now, just when he was starting to hit a breakthrough. First the letter, and then this. And just as he'd managed to get some idea of where things might have been.

"Just wondering. Hermione wondered if you were going to come down for dinner with us." he said in a falsely cheerful voice. Then, as he closed the door, he added under his breath "Please come, I don't think I can cope with seeing Hermione and Krum all over each other again."

Harry couldn't help laughing to himself at his friends desperate face, and also poking it at him just a little bit more.

"Shouldn't that be professor Krum to you, Mr Weasley. Since students are required to be respectful of their teachers at all times. I should really report you."

"You're as bad." Harry ducked as Ron aimed a book at his head. "And you don't even call him Krum half the time. You call him Victor don't you." he glared angrily at the door "Just like _she_ does. Traitor."

Harry didn't even have to ask who _she _was. Ron had been getting steadily more and more stroppy the longer Hermione spent in the company of Victor Krum. So much so that there were bets going round the student population as to how long it would be until he cracked. There was quite big money going on it too, with much of the betting being managed from outside the school by non other than Fred and George Weasley themselves.

"How about you just stay here and have lunch with me?" Harry looked up at Ron for a second, and then looked pointedly back down at his book. "I'll cover it with Hermione when I see her."

"Oh, okay then. If you insist." Harry's thoughts that his exasperation was fake were just allied when Ron opened the door and spoke out into the hallway, to where he was now sure Hermione Granger and Victor Krum were standing. "He says he can't come." Ron was having real trouble disguising the delight in his voice. "But he asked me to stay up here and give him a hand. We'll grab something later or get something brought up here."

"Oh, are you sure." Harry could only imagine that Ron had given her a signal as to what was going on, because seconds later she resigned. "Oh okay then, if you're sure. But I'll drop in later and check up on everything, okay?"

"Sure. You do that."

Ron pushed the door shut, and then sank down into the chair opposite Harry's desk, which he now littered was littered with bits of paper, rough sketches and open books.

"Okay then, talk." He frowned. "I can tell something's up. Tell me all."

"Harry looked up from the book he'd gone back to briefly, and Ron, glancing down, noticed what looked like a map."

"I think I've done it." he said simply.

"Done what?" Ron asked, but Harry just shook his head.

"I've still got to check some points. You'll have to wait until Hermione gets here to see if she thinks the same as me."

He took up a pen, and pulling a clean piece of parchment towards him, wrote a scribbled note.

Dear Aunt Petunia,

Just got your letter, but I'm kind of busy. I know you just want what's best for me, but even I don't know what this is. This may be the last letter you get from me for a while, because I've got something I want to do. I don't plan to take Ron or Hermione with me, though they'll probably insist they come. Or Ron will anyway, but Hermione has a new boyfriend so I'm not so sure about her. He will want to come with but I don't want him to know what's going on, it would be too risky, in case the other side found out what we're up to.

If you write back send your letters to Hogwarts as usual and I'll pick them up if and when I return, but I don't know when that will be so don't wait up for me.

I remain,

Harry James Potter.

Ha. Crappy ending to a chapter. Cruel ending to a chapter. Heehee, now I can post this story again you'll be getting a lot more of it XD. Reviews are, as always, appreciated.

Love as always, Sami-Chan, the Stargazing Maiden.


	14. Leaving Hogwarts

Chapter fourteen: Leaving Hogwarts

**Chapter fourteen: Leaving Hogwarts**

Next chapter. I actually deleted what I had done for this when I reached a major breakthrough on how its supposed to work. I decided what the last Horcrux was, and no, I'm not going to tell you now. But what I will say is that it was a major breakthrough and has caused me to re-think my entire plot (what there was of it). Anyway, next chapter. Enjoy.

**Disclaimer:** I don't own Potter or any of the Related Characters.

It was strange really, to think that after all the time he'd spent looking he'd finally discovered what he was looking for. Two months had passed since Harry sent the letter to Petunia, and there was still no action in connection with the Horcrux. Well, there was, but just not the level of what his friends had hoped. Harry had, it appeared, discovered a huge secret in connection with them, but he wouldn't as yet give much more information. All he would tell them was that he knew that there was one within the castle, and he had a fair idea what it was, but he wasn't going to try and get that one yet, because it wouldn't do him any good. These things had to be done in the right order, with the right preparations, and it wasn't right to destroy that one just yet. He wouldn't give them any more details and in the end Ron and Hermione just gave up asking.

It wasn't all over though, as Harry was constantly reminding them. He knew where a second of the Horcruxes was, and was just waiting until everyone got back from Christmas before he went to get it. He didn't want to leave without saying goodbye, he said, and although they pretended not to notice it, this comment was always followed by mutterings under his breath, in which Ginny's name and often Neville's popped up. Everyone could see it though, the way Harry Potter looked at Ginny Weasley and the way she looked back at him. And it was common knowledge that given the circumstances, they would have been together unquestionably. Many people even asked how come a nice boy should have to go through so much pain, and still be asked to deal with so much more. Ron and Hermione spent many days trying to get Harry to talk to them, but he always refused, until finally, after much waiting, the day came.

Harry sat and sucked the end of his quill thoughtfully, before looking down at what he had written and groaning to himself. Three hours and all he had come up with was a few measly sentences.

"Dear Ginny,

I've had to go away for a while. I'll be back as soon as I can. Don't worry about me. You know I've got to do this for everyone."

Hardly the best of letters, or the most informative, but Harry just couldn't think what else to write. Sure, he could have written more, he could have explained to her what he was going to do. He could have told her that he might not return and that he loved her and had done for years. But he just couldn't bring himself to put it down on paper. It was as if writing things down was like bringing a finality to them, a finality he wasn't ready to deal with just yet. Written words were final, Dumbledore, and Sirius, had taught him that. After all, it had been Sirius's will which had left him the house he would eventually, provided he survived, call home. And it was Dumbledore's written instructions to him which told him what he had to do, told him how to destroy a Horcrux and how to manage with the stress of knowing that you had killed something, even if it was just a shard of soul and not really alive. No, Harry thought, he couldn't put all he was feeling into words. If it was to be said then it would be said to her face, and he couldn't bare to see how upset she would be if she heard him tell her that he might die. It would break his heart.

Sighing, he signed his name at the bottom of the note, sealed it with her name and left it on the table where he knew he would find it in the morning. Then, without so much as a thought, he rose from his seat, crossed the common room and stepped quietly up the stairs, pausing only to make sure he had the correct room before entering and tapping his sleeping friend on the shoulder.

"'Mione, wake up, its time."

She was awake in seconds, rubbing sleep from her eyes as she pulled on her robes, grabbed her wand and a rucksack from under her bed. "I've been packed for ages, I'm ready when you are."

"Okay, I'll just go and wake up Ron and meet you downstairs in five minutes." came his whispered reply. "Though it might be slightly longer, you know Ron."

"Okay, tell him I've already packed for him so it doesn't matter that he didn't bother." She smiled and nodded, and then sighed as she watched his retreating back run down the stairs. He was a great person, but sometimes being best friends with Harry Potter just wasn't the easiest thing in the world. It had become even worse since McGonnigal had shown him how to get up to the girls dormitory, and it had since become a regular occurrence to be awoken at strange hours in the morning simply because he wanted to chat.

"Ron, wake up." he whispered, shaking his best friend roughly awake. While the gentle approach might work for Hermione, Ron tended to need a heavier hand.

"What, Harry, what's up?" The blurry reply came from somewhere deep underneath the covers. "Its three AM, what's so important?"

"Its time to go." came the hurried reply. "Hermione's waiting downstairs for us. She says not to worry about packing, because she's already got all your stuff together. Just hurry up, we need to get out of here quick."

"What? Oh, okay." Ron groaned, and started to pull himself up out of his bed, and Harry couldn't help laughing at the bright orange underwear that just couldn't help but make itself known.

"Come on, I'll meet you downstairs. I just want to grab a few things." He smiled as his friend blearily rubbed his eyes and stretched before pulling on his robes, which Harry didn't have the heart to tell him were backwards.

Five minutes later found Harry, Ron and Hermione walking quietly along the passages of Hogwarts and slipping out of a side gate without so much as a whisper. Hurrying across the grass they stopped under a tree, the same tree under which James had played with the snitch all those years ago, and Harry pulled out his wand.

"Don't mention to anyone that I did this." he closed his eyes and thought for a moment, before making a complicated motion in the air. "There we go, that should do it." he opened his eyes. "We should be able to apirate out of the grounds now, so long as we stay within five yards of the tree when we go."

Hermione looked aghast for a minute, but a reassuring smile from Ron convinced her that it was all okay, and that this had in fact been planned a long time in advance.

"We're going to Grimmauld Place." Came Harry's quiet whisper, before with a breath of wind he disappeared.

"What's going on?" Hermione asked Ron, looking doubtful, but he just shrugged his shoulders.

"I know no more than you really. He told me that he'd been given permission to open an apiration point somewhere in the grounds but only for five minutes so it didn't cause too much of a security breach. And he told me that we'd be heading to Grimmauld Place because that was secure, but he wouldn't say any more. I was hoping you'd be able to tell me something, but I guess he didn't really tell either of us anything." Grabbing her hand quickly, he forced her to follow him as he apirated out of the grounds and into the big wild world.

This felt like a good place to end the chapter, so I did. The next chapter will be up when I finish writing it, but its more likely to come if I get the reviews for it.


	15. Grimmauld Place

Well, I'm writing this directly after chapter fourteen

Well, I'm writing this directly after chapter fourteen. Actually, its half two in the morning and I haven't even moved from in front of my computer since writing the last one, just carried straight on. Why, you might be asking, didn't I just carry on writing chapter fourteen and not move onto this one. The answer? I thought the last chapter would end well there, and if I didn't finish this one in time then it would give me some leeway. Also, I like to start chapters from a new location, or new part of the story. So here we are.

**Disclaimer: **I don't own Harry Potter, mores the pity.

They landed with a soft bump on the cold floor in Grimmauld Place, and Harry immediately set about making sure that all the security precautions were still in place, before flopping into the nearest chair and looking around. They had arrived, despite what he would have suspected, in the huge faulted kitchen, and he was now sitting at the scrubbed wooden table which had been the centre point for so many wonderful family meals, back when there was still fun and enjoyment in the world. Ron and Hermione took seats at the other side of the table and then looked at him expectantly for what felt like hours to the constantly on edge Harry. It was Hermione who finally broke the silence which had been threatening to encase them for eternity.

"Well, are you going to tell us then?" she asked, and Ron quickly joined in.

"Yeah, we came here didn't we. And we're ready to know what's going on now. I know you couldn't talk in Hogwarts, but you can tell us now, can't you?"

Harry smiled, but it was a tired smile, well beyond his seventeen years, and his reply was strained, but he began anyway.

"Well, I've discovered the locations of two of the Horcruxes, and I know something about the third. I also know how to defeat them when we find them but I know that's not really what you're interested in so I'll tell you the real details.

There is one Horcrux in Godric's Hollow, in my parent's house. We didn't find in when we were last there because we weren't looking, and we didn't know what to expect. I think it's the cup and I think he got Wormtail to plant it there before he killed my parents, because it was the last place anyone would think of looking and also because it was supposed to be the finest murder he had committed. The second one is what we thought was something belonging to one of the founders, except we were wrong about that too." He paused, and looked across at his two friends, where Ron was staring at him open mouthed, and Hermione had a look of concentration on her face which Harry could only see as a sign that she was digesting all this new information. He looked down at his hand for a minute, and then continued.

"I think the final Horcrux didn't belong to one of the founders because it belonged to all of them. I've thought this through a lot, and I think he made the Sorting Hat into a Horcrux. I know its going to be difficult for you to really understand why I think that, but I just do. After all, we all know that he's an extremely powerful wizard, and would go to any lengths to look after number one. We also know that he prized items connected to the school above all else. My theory is that he turned the hat into a Horcrux the night he almost killed Ginny. She would have counted as close enough to death for it to count, and he had my wand, and the sorting hat was there as well. It didn't matter that he was such a young boy, because that was just the form he took. It was still a Horcrux and so knew that his soul hadn't been split into as many pieces as he originally planned, so it would have made sense for him to create his last Horcrux at that minute in time."

He looked over once more at his friends, willing them to speak, to tell him that he was stupid or delusional, or that he was making things up, but was pleasantly surprised when those reactions never came. Instead, Hermione looked up from where she had been intently studying her fingernails, and, not looking at him, spoke quietly but quickly.

"You know what Harry, I think you could be right, about both cases. It would make sense for him to want to hide something in your parents house, and if your theory is right, then it could only be the ring or the cup. We know the snake stays with him all the time, and that the ring has been destroyed. We also know it probably wasn't the locket, because of RAB. The diary's been destroyed too, and if your theory about the sorting hat is true then it must be. As for the hat, well, it would make sense in a strange type of way. I was going to say that there would have to be an extremely powerful enchantment on it for it not to burn the students or cause any problems with sorting, to stop it being biased towards Slytherns. But you sort of countered that problem by pointing out how powerful he is. Apart from that, well, I think it all makes sense. As for getting rid of them, I've been researching the magic needed and I know we can do it, I can teach you the spells when we need to know them." she looked over at Ron for support, and found him looking between her and Harry, with an aghast look on his face.

"You two." He muttered half heartedly "How am I ever supposed to keep up with you. All this time I thought we didn't have a clue and now I find Harry knows the locations of two of the Horcruxes and Hermione knows how to kill them. And there was me panicking that we would never find them all, we've already located three, if you include the snake, and the ring and the diary have already been destroyed. That means we've only got to find the last one, the locket, but that's the only one we don't have any leads on at all."

Harry leant back on his chair at those words, smiling to himself.

"Sure, what both of you have said is in essense true, but you're both forgetting my third bit of information. We actually do have a clue about the locket Ron, the best clue we'll ever need." He grinned at his mate and received a puzzled expression in return.

"Think about it Ron." Harry sighed "What family do we know who lost someone to Voldemort? What family do we know which could have got close enough to his inner circle to possibly find out something that secret? What family do we know that has a record, at least recently, of refusing to participate in the dark ways, or being killed by Voldemorts followers?" he looked around at Ron and Hermione triumphantly, and this time it was Ron who answered him first.

"But, mate, the only person we knew who's family was like that was Sirius and his brother died. Oh." a strange look came over his face, and then he looked up and met Harry's eyes for the first time in months "Regulus Artimitus Black. R.A.B"

Okay, so strange ending for a chapter, but this was more just a filler than anything else. I'm not going to update again until I get a review for at least one of the latest three chapters I've posted, because I've been getting nothing and its driving me mad and making me loose my inspiration. So you review, I write. Thanks for reading though,

Sami-chan, the stargazing Maiden.


	16. MAJOR AUTHORS NOTE

Not exactly a chapter this but I thought it was important that I allowed you few people who kept this on alert to know the situation.

I've been offline, having a broken computer and no internet, since last june. That issue however, is now fixed. I lost all my backups of everything when I had to wipe my hard-drive but have been able to download everything that was stored on and plan to start writing either tonight or tomorrow.

Thanks for your patience during this time, and chapters will be back soon.

Love always,

Sammy Hussey,

The one and only Stargazing Maiden


	17. chapter 16 feelings

Chapter 16: Emotions.

DISCLAIMER: I don't own Potter, I wish I did, but I don't.

A/N: I know, its been since June, but I moved house and my pc got broken in the move. And I lost EVERYTHING! So even though I was like 12 chapters ahead I lost it all. This is me trying to get back into it. This chapter is more of just a filler, setting up emotions within the characters which I need to use in later chapters.

"so, you're saying that all this time we could have found RAB if we'd just put our mind to thinking about it?" Ron asked, flumping on onto the cushioned sofa and glaring bitterly at the patterned rug beneath his feet. He was still sour over the fact that he hadn't had a part in the discovery, and was taking his angry mood out on his friends.

" I mean, seriously." he kicked at the rug furiously and sent dust clouds flying into the air "Would it have been that much effort just to tell me what you were thinking? Did you really have to hide everything from me like that."

Behind his back Harry and Hermione rolled their eyes at each other. They were used to his attitude at this point. It had been a week since Harry had revealed his theories to them just after their arrival at grimmauld place, and Ron's mood was yet to improve. Hermione, in typical fashion, had set to work instantly at devising plans to make the inevitable fights easier, and Harry was lost in his own world and thoughts, but it seemed like everything they tried to involve Ron in he threw away. He was stuck in his own little world of hatred, and nothing they could do would pull him out of it. And they had tried, there was no doubt that they had tried. Because every day they would have some new task for Ron, some new dreadfully important thing that could only be done with his skills, something only he could do. But he was never enthusiastic, and that was what hurt so much. Because they were doing their best with him, and he just didn't want to know. Everything they said to him would be treated with the same contempt and hatred as if they had spat in his face, and at this point there was nothing more either of them felt they could do.

It wasn't their fault, Hermione reasoned when they sat up late at night discussing the situation. How were they to know that Ron would choose that particular moment to enter the room, that he would be so shocked by what he found. It wasn't like there was anything between them, Harry would inevitably reply, they were just two people who happened to be in the wrong place at the wrong time, and something uncomfortable happened. But Ron didn't see it like that. He seemed to see it as a complete betrayal of his faith that his two best friends would dare to kiss each other in private, let alone in an area he saw as public. Though, as Hermione had tried to explain to him a million and one times, the drawing room in grimmauld place wasn't exactly public. And there was nothing between them. 

Anyone who took a moment to look could see that Harry was completely devoted to Ginny, and Hermione was keeping her heart hidden, for although there was someone there, she wasn't ready to let her feelings out yet, it was something she just wanted to keep to herself, at least for the time. Maybe one day, when the time was right, then she'd be ready to reveal the way she felt for that certain someone, but not yet, not until she was sure for herself that she was feeling that way, and not until she was sure that her feelings would be returned. If there was one thing Hermione was most afraid of it was rejection, there had been too much of that in her life. From the moment she was born her life was filled with rejection. For years and years she felt nothing but neglect from her parents. They loved her, she didn't doubt that for a second, but they were both so caught up in their work, they very rarely had time for their child, she was just a piece of their lives to be fed, clothed and generally ignored. She spent years trying to gain their attention through acting up and being bold, but in the end she discovered that the only answer was to study, only through working hard would she find the acceptance she craved from them, only through that would she gain a little bit of pride from them. And it was that, above all else, that hurt her most. That she was rejected most of her life, and that when she finally found love, on her first day of school, she was afraid to say, for fear that she would be rejected again. And it was that what was hardest about Ron being so angry, because he was the one person she could not bare to be angry at her, the one person she was unable to feel anything other than love for, and he was throwing it away at the slightest hiccup, the slightest mistake. It had only happened because she was sad over him, because she had been talking to Harry about how he would never feel the same, and about how little experience she had and how she was afraid she wouldn't be good enough for him. And then somehow something had happened and she had ruined everything.

For Harry, the situation was simple. Him and Hermione had kissed. He didn't know who had started it, and he didn't know who had ended it. All he knew was that it felt wrong, the feel of her lips on his wasn't right and he didn't want to be in that position. And given her reaction afterwards she felt the same way. When they had kissed it had been Ginny running through his head, it was Ginny who he wanted there, Ginny whos hands he wanted around his waste, Ginny who he wanted to cuddle and hold close. But it wasn't, and it broke him, reminding him of everything that he had given up, to go out on this fight. And it made him destest his destiny, so much. Because how was it that he, just a normal boy, should be forced to deal with so much more than anyone else in the world did, when he was barely even an adult. How was it fair that he had to give up his chance at love just to make people happy? How could life work that way? And if he was honest, he really hated it, because while a part of him knew that this was the way things had to be, that he had no control over his destiny, another part of him wondered why. Why should he have to go through this when he'd already lost so much, why was it him. Why couldn't it be others, why couldn't he share his burden with other people. And why did he feel the need to protect the one person who wanted to share this with him, protect her to the point that he was driving her away, making her keep away from him for fear that she would be hurt, when he was hurting for not having her there. He hated himself for that, but loved himself too. It broke his heart to go home every night to grimmauld place, to sit on the edge of his bed and imagine her getting ready all those miles away in Hogwarts castle, but at the same time he knew it was best. He couldn't have ever asked her to give up her education for him, and he couldn't have brought her into danger. And he knew, somewhere inside him, that dispite any regrets he might have late at night, that he had done the right thing in rejecting her. And that even if the time came, years away, and he asked her to take him back and she said no, he would accept that. Because the only important thing to him, really, was her happiness…

Ron was confused. Basically and simply he was confused. He had discovered, completely by accident, his feelings for someone. But it seemed like she didn't feel the same way. How could she, when she had kissed his best friend. How was there any way that she could feel anything for him when she would do something like that. It was, he concluded, nothing more or less than evil. It wasn't like he'd ever hidden his feelings, after all, but he'd never shown them off either. How could he, when he didn't realise initially what he felt, when it was only when he saw her in another persons arms that he really realised his true feelings for her. Sure, he'd suspected it for a while. When she was with Viktor Krum it drove him crazy, he felt things which he'd never felt before, but it was definatly seeing her with Harry that hurt him the most. How could they, the two people who had always been most important to him, do this to him. Push him out like that when he needed them most, when he already felt so inferior to them for not being able to help with the search. It was that betrayal, not that they'd found other people but that they'd found each other, that hurt him the most.

Yeah I know, filler chapter, but I wanted to get their feelings about each other across before I continue with the story, since its been so long since I worked


	18. another emergency authors note

heya, so i know this is really against rules but i just thought i'd let all of you know that this story has not completely died. i just had major blocks with it, and i have exams for the next two weeks. but for you eleven people who are still watching this story and waiting for the updates (i love you all for being so loyal) i promise there will be a new chapter within the next three weeks.

if not i give you all full permission to hunt you down and kill me lol

lovage out

stargazing maiden 


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